7 Days to Election 2008

I am feeling a weight this morning. After listening to the news, reading other blogs etc.
Some "talking heads" are saying this is the most important election of our lifetime. There are a couple of moral questions on ballots in some states, one in mine.

I support John McCain. Always have. I have worked and will work to support him being elected. The day he announced Sarah Palin, I immediately told my kids "We just lost the election." I have been disappointed in his "catering" to the right wing of the republican party. I think he will run the country much different than he is running his campaign. I highly regard someone who says what is not popular, what he truly thinks is best, which I'm not sure is best for his campaign, so he isn't doing it right now. He will get back on track once elected. He has a long history. Go check it out. http://www.johnmccain.com/

I respect Obama. I read one of his books before he started to run for president. I disagree with his policy's.
http://www.barackobama.com/index.php I have some who will not like what I'll say next, but. There have been a couple of speeches he has done that has reminded me of the Book of Mormon. Someone saying flattering words that the people want to hear. I believe he will do serious moral damage to our nation in the long run if he were president. I think he personally is great and a moral man doing what he thinks is best. Again, I disagree with his policy's.

I don't live in CA. I never will. Marriage is between a man and a woman. Marriage is ordained of God. http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/same-sex-marriage-and-proposition-8

I live in WA. Life is sacred. Trust in God to decide when it begins and when it ends. http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/public-issues/euthanasia-and-prolonging-life

Vote NO on I-1000 http://noassistedsuicide.com/

Now back to my laundry which doesn't feel so heavy this morning.

Follow Up

To follow up with my last post.
I read part of my RS lesson, it was a "story" from a book I got at a youth conference 28 years ago. I read it to my kids. One of them (sincerely) thanked me for reading it to them. It helped to focus my attentions to where they should be. Scripture reading is always good, but this story put it in real life context for us.
The kid who "flipped off" my kids, came to the school and apologized. My kids were happy, so I am happy. It was handled well.
My to do list on Monday's is always laundry. I don't have a car so I'm focused on the house only today...after I write another post.

Sick

I am just sick and beside myself. An "incident" happened a couple of week ago when my child was away at outdoor school. An older school child in a position of authority told a group of boys about his "orientation". I was fairly pleased with how the "situation" was handled by my child and the responsible adults there, so I did not feel the need to do anymore than what had already occurred.
Until today.
The same kid walked by our home and "flipped off" my 2 youngest. My kids were looking at him through the window and I talked to my kids that no one likes to feel intimidated by people starring at them. Still he shouldn't have flipped them off. I am trying to handle this now. I am feeling upset and sick over it. The lack of respect. There are appropriate ways to deal with situations and there are bad ways to handle them and then there are really bad ways. Which will I choose?
I am a person who will git up'n yur grill when I feel my kids are being hurt. I have a long history of defending the "innocent" or underdog even at my own peril. My family knows this about me. My hubby is similar. This is not enough for my children.
I am thinking about my home. I am thinking about how my home feels. I am thinking about the things that take place here and the things that do not, good and bad. I need to do more to raise these children to be defenders of the faith, stand for truth, stand for righteous behavior, armor them up. I do have control over this home. I do not have hardly any at what occurs outside it. I need to do more. Much More.

There is a RS lesson I taught around 14 years ago that comes to mind. I think I'll go read it.
Maybe that is the medicine I need today for my illness.

Primary Sacrament Meeting

I finished our matching dresses. Hers looked great! Mine had problems, I ripped out the invisible zipper 3 times & still had a pucker on the "hind end". My daughter really wanted me to wear it so I did, one time.

Read this post first.
When I read her blog this morning I have to many emotions and thoughts to comment on her blog so thought I should post myself.
I don't know the short hand for "tears in my eyes" so I'll put "tie".
My first councilor was inspired to have the kids write their own parts this year. It was great for me to not be stressed out and totally relaxed. The whole thing was in very capable hands. Trust. Trust in the Lord. Do all that we can and then let it go. I trusted her to be inspired. I trusted her ability to figure out logistics. I also trusted her to tell me what she needed from me and tried to stay out of her way.

Now to comment on her 10.
10-great idea
9-glad for the new direction we now have
8-thank you, but credit goes to Heavenly Father. He knows his children and knows the desires of my heart, knows our talents (and lack off, LOL) and knows what these children would respond to and found an idea that makes us happy. A Tender Mercy. tie
7-I tried to tell everyone that "Jeanelle wrote it" "Jeanelle did all of it".
6-As a mom-One of my children spent a lot of time thinking about it and wrote at least 2 versions that I saw. He took the opportunity to ponder and came up with the most honest thing he could. It was short and sounded like a "pat Mormon answer" but as him mom, it was not. He said what he has had to deal with and struggle with and he came up with his part by sharing what he was comfortable with sharing. His heart was sincere though his words were short. He took the opportunity to be inspired and did his best. This investment will help his eternal progression. tie big time
As prez.-everyone got to see a glimpse into these children's lives. They said things we could have never written.
5-I was wondering what happened. Glad I was in the dark.
4-Basic is good. We had a lot of non-LDS people there.
3-This was the highlight for me! This was the moment I was most anxious for. I was nearly jumping out of my seat with nerves for him. He did it! His mom saw a change in him later that day, wondering if this might be an experience that may have broken the ice? tie
2-sorry I was AWOL for most of it. tie I even called had to have hubby come because of #1
1-still trying to figure that one out. Why? This is a song that one day I hope my "Spiritual Intimacy" "issues" will work out and it will mean something to me. I just don't "get it". I have an entire life time of experiences of fighting "it?". tie

Now can I go take a nap?

Sew Sew

Yesterday 3 friends came over and we sewed PJ pants for Christmas presents. Didn't finish'em so they are coming back tonight.
Another friend's daughter wants help with making a Homecoming dress modest. I'll work on that next Monday-Tue.
I hope to cut out a new dress for me and a kid today before they come back home. Kids have half day today. I would like new clothes for the Primary Sacrament Meeting this Sunday.
I should be working on sharing time, but no, I'd rather sew. I am looking at the patterns and realized it has been a very long time since I made clothes that required more than a couple of seams.
Do I like this creative process? I'm not very good, just OK. My sewing is only so so good.

Spiritual Intimacy

A couple of blogs I follow have shared their thoughts on their experience with the LDS General Conference from this past week-end. I am grateful to know great women. The following thoughts are personal and have less to do with Gen. Conf. and more to do with where I am currently at. I prefer to not have any comments posted, you may email me if you just have to.

I've recently been able to "label" that I am not comfortable with spiritual intimacy. I believe that there are different degrees of spiritual intimacy. I am at ease with a level of responsibility and duty to religious practices, such as attending worship service, meetings, reading scriptures, saying routine family prayers etc. I push myself to try to obtain a level of openness to feeling the Holy Spirit and am successful at times.

I am currently testing a personal theory based on what makes up my "soul". (I'm tearing up writing this, this is very personal) My spirit comes from Heavenly Father and my body came from my parents and the two combined make up my soul.

• The spirits greatest joy comes from when my spirit is open and most vulnerable. Think of this in terms of loving, soft, forgiving, grateful heart with an open, meek mind earnest to learn.
• My body receives it's greatest pleasure when I am physically open and most vulnerable as well. Think of this in terms of creative talents, runners high and the physical relationship between husband and wife.

Now I am trying to combine the two aspects. The souls greatest experiences and pleasure in life are when the spirit and body BOTH are at their most open and vulnerable.

Is this what the scriptures mean "Men are that they might have joy?"

I feel like I have spent my whole life fighting these "joys".

So for General Conference we were at home in our PJ's while we watched all 4 sessions. I finally, after many years, made a batch of cinnamon rolls with nuts. It was to sweet though. I took notes and was surprised that it felt like it went faster and I was not as tired and sleepy afterwards. I teared up once or twice. I had a small fight with hubby once. I made my kids stay up way past bedtime to clean the house Sat. night. I was just to embarrassed by it when a friend came over. Jamie had lost her phone so I could not talk to her about what she thought of conference until yesterday. Her roommates dad said the opening prayer Sunday, forget which one.

Pounding Heart

My emotions were spun up in so many different areas yesterday. I believe we experience all things for our learning and growth. I trust in my Heavenly Father to know what I can handle, what I can't and that he has a plan for me. I believe He has a big picture for me even when I am face to face with a small piece of it.

• I had to compose an email yesterday morning to a "friend" that gets under my skin very easily. I have to be very careful in how I word my purpose. My heart pounds.
• My son experienced some "Mormon Bashing" at school. The teacher was unaware until my email this morning. She emailed me back and then called me too. It will be handled today, I hope well. My heart pounds.
• My other son experienced making some poor choices after other kids made some of their bad choices. The grandfather approached my son (whom we don't know) and started to dress him down on the street. My son was scared. I went to speak with the grandfather and ask that he not approach my son in the future but to the school or me directly. It was handled well. My heart pounds.
• My VT'ers came over yesterday in which I brought up a personal struggle and asked for their advice and council. They gave loving and kind wisdom. My tearful heart was softened. My heart is scared.
• A good friend called. Her one year old is in ICU. My heart aches for this mom.

I don't see the big picture of yesterday. I made choices of how to handle each situation, as did others. I am not second guessing any of my actions. I am glad to have the confidants in myself and my hubby. I am glad hubby has my back. I am grateful that I trust my Heavenly Father knows me and knows why to push my heart to pound.